My phone vibrated across my desk and an unidentified number flashed onto the screen. Curiosity prickled my skin and a smile inched along my face as I reached to answer the call… maybe it will be someone I know calling from a different phone, or maybe, just maybe, it will be a wrong number!
I love being on the receiving line of wrong numbers, mostly because I love reveling in peoples social awkwardness, but also because it’s just fun to get a sneak peek into other people’s lives. There are three types of wrong numbers: 1) the “ask and hang up”: wrong number calls and asks for so-and-so, you have to tell them that you don’t know so-and-so and they hang up because they have the wrong number. The second type is the “disbeliever”: wrong number calls, asks for so-and-so. You tell them that they have the wrong number and then they respond with “are you sure”? Of course you’re fucking sure! This is your phone, you answered, and you are not so-and-so! Duh! And number three is my favourite…three is the conversationalist: these people don’t even ask to speak to so-and-so. They just assume that they’ve got the right number so they just jump right into their convo, telling you things and asking you questions along the way. I love three the most because it has the highest risk of social awkwardness.
Today’s wrong number was brought to you by the number three!
“Hello,” I say when I pick up my phone.
“Ugh, so I’m late and I’m on my way to St. Paul’s,” says the girl on the other line.
I have no clue who this is!
“Okay…” I say.
“Is this Sandy’s cell phone?” says the wrong number.
“Noooooo,” I respond, trying not to giggle.
She starts to laugh and goes on a two minute rant about how she just got a new phone and spent all of last night updating her phone numbers and how she must have put Sandy’s (which she thinks is my phone) cell number under her home listing and that she must be calling Sandy’s home line by mistake…. “Are you Sandy’s mom?” she asks.
“No, I don’t even know a Sandy,” I say, laughing.
“Oh! Is this the wrong number? Oh, man, I am so sorry!”
I kept laughing and told Sandy’s friend to have a nice day.