Monday, January 18, 2010

The Sweetest Surprise

My boyfriend is not the romantic type. He doesn't like holidays, he doesn't like buying cards and he's only ever given me flowers once. But the other day he gave me a surprise that made me swoon.

Before he left for school he told me that he had a surprise for me and that I would get it when he got home. Of course, being the insanely curious person I am, surprises drive me nuts. I spent most of the day trying to figure out what he was getting me. He had left me with only one clue: it was a three part surprise. Three parts! There are a zillion things out there that have three parts! I didn't quite guess a zillion things, but some of my guesses included: a cheese burger (buns, meat and cheese), a fruit salad (strawberries, mango and filler fruit) and a book (beginning, middle and end). So many guesses and all of them wrong.

When my boyfriend, Scott, finally got home he presented me with my surprise which was: a bouquet of fair trade roses, a love letter and a gift certificate for the Great American Back Rub. Now, all these things may seem random by themselves, but joined together and knowing me, they are the most thoughtful gifts any one has ever given me.

You should know I'm a hippie at heart. I'm always lecturing Scott about ways in which we can improve our environment and society by loving the earth and each other. So, when he gave me the roses he told me that he had chosen them specifically because they were fair trade flowers and that he knew that would mean something to me, which it did. He wanted to show me that he cared about things I was passionate about and that all my lecturing had a "little" bit of influence over him.

Secondly, he gave me the gift certificate for a back rub. You should know, that along with being a hippie, I am also a hard worker and have gained a bad back from past work experience. Scott gives me a back rub every day to help me relax and put me to sleep. The gift of a professional back rub was him showing me that he understood what my body needs and that he cares about my physical well being.

Thirdly, he wrote me a love letter explaining his gifts. His letter said that he chose a random day on the calendar that wasn't associated with a holiday or a mile stone in our relationship for a reason. He wanted to show how much he loved me by giving these meaningful gifts on a day when I'd know that they were just coming from him and him alone. That they weren't influenced by a commercial holiday or an anniversary, they were just influenced by his love and appreciation for me. He wanted to say "I love you" without a Hallmark holiday getting in the way of the gifts true meaning.

This last gesture made the most impression on me. It got me thinking about holidays, like Valentines Day, which is just around the corner. Why do we make such a big deal about telling people that we love them or that they are special on very specific days? Shouldn't we put more emphasis on those small daily gifts, like giving someone a back rub, or making someone dinner, on all the regular days of the year, instead of the big hoopla we surround holidays with? This all reminded me of when Alice in Wonderland celebrates her un-birthday! Maybe we need more un-birthday's and un-holidays in our day to day. Scott's random, surprise message of love made me think about not waiting for Valentine's Day to tell my friends and family how much I love them! It made me think about not waiting for Christmas to spend quality time with my extended family! And maybe, him getting me to think about all this, is the greatest gift of all.

If you're reading this and it's a random day, if it's not a mile stone in our relationship or a holiday, I want you to know I love you. I appreciate you and all you do. Thanks for being out there! Yours truly, Amanda Jerome xoxo.

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